E       
    Once I read a book 
G
  And this is what it said 
A                    
  If your music has a beat 
E                             
Then you're gonna wind up dead 
                                 G
It doesn't really matter if it's Christian or not
        A                           E
If it's syncopated rhythm then your soul is gonna rot 
    E                     G      
And this book was called ‘Ha You’re Gonna Burn 
    A                     E
And in the second chapter I went on to learn 

[Chorus]
E         G
Take two houseplants 
    A               E
And put them to the test 
                          G
Set them both in front of speakers 
            A            E
And let the music do the rest
                       G
The first one you play Mozart
             A           E
Or something lovely like that 
                             G             A           
The second one you play that Petra or that Megadeath
N.C.                                           E        
Doesn't really matter what kind of rock it is 

[Verse]
     E            G
So I took my two houseplants
      A               E
And I put them to the test 
                          G
Set them both in front of speakers 
           A            E
To let the music do the rest 
                G
I powered up my Pioneers 
   A             E
To let the music roar 
    E              G
But twenty minutes later 
          A              E     N.C.
Someone's knocking at my door 

E
  I opened up my door 
G
  And there my neighbor stood 
         A
He said,    man I'd like to get some sleep
E
If you think I could
        E              G
I said, man, can't you see here 
         A                       E
I've got this moral dilemma that I got to get clear 
         E
He said, what kind of moral dilemma 
          G                   
Could you have at this time of night 
           A
That could make me so angry 
       E 
That I just want to fight 

     E                   G
So I pointed to the page in that open book 
           A
That had a picture of a potted plant 
            E
And I said, Go have a look

And he read 

[Chorus]
E         G
Take two houseplants 
    A               E
And put them to the test 
                          G
Set them both in front of speakers 
            A            E
And let the music do the rest
                       G
The first one you play Mozart
             A           E
Or something lovely like that 
                             G             A           
The second one you play that Petra or that Megadeath
N.C.                                           E        
Doesn't really matter what kind of rock it is 

[Verse]
E
 First of all he said, 
       G
That's Wagner that you're playing 
     A
I've never heard of Petra 
          E
And isn't Megadeath all dead 

    E           G              
And secondly, emphatically
   A                    E
He asked me, what's the sense 
   E                G 
Of hanging out with houseplants when, hey,
       A                E
I live right across the fence

N.C.
And I thought to myself, you know, that's a good point 

[Chorus]
     E           G
So I took my two houseplants
      A                  E
And I put them both back outside 
    E         G
And me and my neighbor 
         A              E
Well, we went out for a drive 
   E            G
We talked about all the things 
     A             E         
That really matter most 
     E                 G                     
Like life and love and happiness 
    A             E         E  G  A  E         
And then the Holy Ghost 
    E          G
And now my two houseplants 
     A              E
They sit out in the sun 
    E         G
But as for my neighbor 
         A              E
Well our friendship has become 
  E            G
A meaningful relationship 
       A                  E
That's headed straight to heaven 

[Outro]
    E
But as for now
   G                                A
We like to sit around and listen to Audio Adrenaline 
                   E
Cranked to eleven!