A two-year marriage from a simple affair In a one-bedroom house that doesn't get much air I said bye to my loves on my wedding night And my new husband put me on the red-eye flight Now I'm wife of a house that I don't care to clean This primal domesticity has made me so mean But now for the story I'm about to tell This is how I got my one-way ticket to hell A beautiful little secretary lingered at his work Acting a little friendlier than just an office clerk My husband started staying late at work every night So I went to check and found that my suspicions were right What am I supposed to try and sweep this under the rug? I killed her And then there was little Julie, the leggy babysitter The way my husband looked at her made me want to hit her And the dresses she would wear, I don't even want to mention So my hands around her throat staged a little intervention If it were you, wouldn't you do the same exact thing that I did? I killed her And then there was busty Janice, the professional pianist And skinny little Nina, the French dry cleaner And who could forget Dolores, the fine exotic florist I didn't hesitate to get them all My husband cried when they each died But no one ever found out it was me Now some may say I'm evil and some may call me mad But I can't hear their voices very well 'Cause it's the love that made me this way, some jealousy that bought me A one-way ticket to hell A one-way ticket to hell A one-way ticket to hell